Koala Parenting: A Guide to Building Emotional Bonds with Your Child

Introduction

If you have been researching different parenting styles, you’ve likely come across all kinds of parenting styles that seem to be named after animals: elephant parenting, panda parenting—the latest trendy parenting style is called koala parenting. Though the term is relatively new, the key characteristics and philosophy behind this parenting approach has been around for decades. If you think you might be a koala parent—in other words, a parent who is focused on affection, bonding with their baby, and is responsive to your child’s emotions—or you simply want to give this parenting style a try, keep reading. Below parenting experts weigh in on koala parenting including the benefits, downsides, and tips for success.

What Is Koala Parenting?

Many people equate koala parenting with attachment parenting, which was coined by William Sears, MD, in the 1980s, says Stephanie Edenburgh, CEO of Bizzie Mommy. Dr. Sears recommended seven key principles with his approach to child rearing, which include: birth bonding, breastfeeding, baby wearing, co-sleeping, belief in responding to baby’s cries, and is wary of any kind training, sleep or otherwise. Today’s koala parents are a loose interpretation of that parenting style. “Much like a mama koala and their baby joey, koala parents prioritize closeness with their child, are incredibly nurturing, and are responsive to their child’s needs,” explains Lilit Ayrapetyan, PsyD, a clinical psychologist based in Los Angeles, California, specializing in maternal mental health. This parenting philosophy is focused on building emotional security and closeness between you and your child, and is rooted in attachment theory, says Ayrapetyan. This means that koala parents are working to build healthy, secure attachments in their kids, which benefits them as they grow up.

Characteristics of a Koala Parent

Koala parents generally have a close relationship with their children, and there tends to be a strong emotional connection between parent and child. “[Koala parenting] promotes closeness, responsiveness, and presence—physically and emotionally—for the child, which many parents lean toward in contrast to more authoritarian routines,” says Edenburgh.

But that doesn’t mean those characteristics are set in stone–parents who want to embrace koala parenting can make it work for their personal family dynamic by following some loose guidelines. For instance, not only do koala parents prioritize frequent physical affection like cuddling and hugs, there also is an abundance of emotional warmth. Here are some other characteristics that koala parents often display.

Respond quickly to their baby’s cries

Like attachment parenting, koala parenting promotes the idea of responding to your baby’s cries and avoiding letting them cry it out.

Demonstrate responsiveness

Koala parents are in touch with their child’s emotions and work quickly to meet their needs, says Ayrapetyan. Eventually, parents learn their baby’s communication style and intuitively understand what they need.

Prioritize skin-to-skin contact

Right from birth, koala parents often have detailed birth plans that include skin-on-skin contact the moment after birth and breastfeeding as soon as possible, says Kristen Miller, director of education at Celebree School.

Hold, hug, and cuddle often

Part of being a koala parent is being in close proximity to one another and frequently holding your child, hugging them, or cuddling with them.

Benefits of Koala Parenting

The biggest advantage to koala parenting is that it supports healthy emotional development and bonding between parent and child. While there is not a lot of specific research on koala parenting, some studies have found that building an attachment with your child from an early age is beneficial.

Downsides of Koala Parenting

While koala parenting can be beneficial, it also can be a physically and emotionally demanding approach to parenting. According to Ayrapetyan, it\’s normal for parents to feel drained when they are always available to meet their child’s emotional needs and be so physically close at all times. In fact, it’s not uncommon to feel touched out if your child is too clingy, she says.

Tips for Practicing Koala Parenting

Koala parenting is all about paying close attention to your child’s emotional signals and meeting them consistently with nurturing care—but that doesn’t mean that working parents can’t try out koala parenting; they just need to try out these tips when they do have one-on-one time with their kids.

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